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What are the 5 stages of emotional healing?

Published in Emotional Healing Stages 3 mins read

The five stages of emotional healing are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This model, originally developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross to describe the stages of grief after a terminal illness, has been applied to other forms of loss and trauma. It's important to remember that these stages are not linear; individuals may experience them in different orders, revisit stages, or experience them simultaneously.

Here's a brief overview of each stage:

1. Denial

Denial is a defense mechanism that helps us cope with overwhelming emotions by refusing to acknowledge the reality of the situation. It's often characterized by disbelief, shock, and emotional numbness.

Example: A person who has experienced a breakup may deny that the relationship is over and convince themselves that their partner will come back.

2. Anger

As denial starts to fade, we may experience anger. This stage is characterized by feelings of resentment, frustration, and hostility. We may be angry at ourselves, others, or the situation itself.

Example: A person grieving the loss of a loved one might be angry at their loved one for leaving them, or at the doctors for not being able to save their loved one.

3. Bargaining

In this stage, we may try to make deals with ourselves or a higher power, hoping to change the situation. This might involve promises, commitments, or requests for a second chance.

Example: A person diagnosed with a serious illness may bargain with a higher power, promising to change their ways if they are given more time.

4. Depression

Depression is a stage marked by sadness, despair, and hopelessness. We may feel withdrawn, exhausted, and unable to cope with the situation.

Example: A person experiencing a divorce might feel depressed and withdrawn, struggling to maintain their routine and find meaning in their life.

5. Acceptance

Acceptance doesn't necessarily mean feeling happy or okay with the situation. It means acknowledging the reality of the loss and coming to terms with it. This stage allows for a sense of peace and a gradual return to a sense of normalcy.

Example: A person who has lost a loved one may find acceptance by honoring their memory and finding ways to carry their legacy.

It's important to remember that everyone's emotional healing journey is unique. While the five stages provide a framework, the experience can vary widely in its duration, intensity, and order.

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